Wednesday, January 21, 2009

Keyword Roundup, Volume 6

A lot of perverts, fatties, and plain old weirdos visit this blog, I think. Here's what they were searching for and what they found:

how does Wii Fit assess age, Wii Fit one at a time please, and Wii Fit laughs fat - Fatty Fat and the Wii Fit. The freakin' eight year old Wii Fit voice does seem to have a smirky tone when it tells you you're a lard-ass.

mass bunny exodus - The Mass-exodus begins. OK, seriously, is there some sort of problem with bunnies in Australia? Someone, please tell me. How about the person who searched for this, since that's where you are. Speak up!

Renée desperate to pee - Keyword Roundup, Volume 4. Oh, look, it's the same pervert from Eastpointe, Michigan, who visited me in Volume 4 looking for poor, bladder-bursting Renée. There is none of that smut here, you sad little man.

my dress dying to pee - main page. No Québec, THERE IS NO PEEING HERE. Comprenez vous?

mature blogspot, French mature blogspot, and mature.blogspot.com - fourteen different visitors from the United Arab Emirates, Slovakia, Egypt, Belgium, Spain, Morocco, Italy, Finland, Germany, Brazil, Saudi Arabia, and Mongolia (wait, they have internet in Mongolia?) read Keyword Roundup, Volume 5 or the main page. Let's just clear this up right now: I am not very mature. Nope, not at all.

Heidi fatty - Zurich, Switzerland found me at Keyword Roundup, Volume 4.

mature Renée, foot mature Renée, and mature Renée feet - main page. What is with maturity and feet, you people in Italy, Argentina, and Croatia? Wait, don't answer that.

inches hair gone - Keyword Roundup, Volume 4.

Heidi Renée - main page. That's my name, Portugal. What's yours?

oldschool costumes - Old-school Halloween costume time.

Glinda crown template - main page.

lonely wife - Just another lonely wife post.

my diarrhea looks like oil - Sometimes my cooking looks like baby diarrhea but I promise it is far more delicious. Sorry to hear that, San Jose. What kind? Olive? Corn? Motor?

reneetube - Keyword Roundup, Volume 5. Maybe that means something if you're from Turkey, like the person who searched for it.

vegan shakes and one shot McDonald's shake - Vegan Shamrock Shakes.

chicken and rice from scratch - Soup from scratch: "chicken" and rice.

bigboobs.blogspot.com - main page. Lonely man alert in Tijuana, Mexico! If you're having trouble finding, ahem, maracas in Tijuana, amigo, you must be doing something terribly wrong.

morning is here sunshine is here - Good morning sunshine! Here is my breakfast.

Vej Naturals - main page.

is Mitchum deoderant sold in Abu Dhabi - main page. I wouldn't know, but good luck with your "oder."

I'm expecting Jason to get back from Jamaica any moment now. When that happens I'll stop checking my stats so obsessive-compulsively. I'm sure you'll all be glad.

4 comments:

Bayjb said...

Those keywords are hilarious. I love seeing what people search for!

HorribleLicensePlates said...

I get some pervs too. The last one that made me chuckle was "NICE BOOTY." I am almost positive they were disappointed!

April said...

These NEVER FAIL to get me laughing! LOL

Michelle said...

"my diarrhea looks like oil" completely just made me wet my pants.